Friends, I have wonderful news! Grapes aren’t just for eating anymore! Oh, no! Grapes, when stuck in between your top lip and teeth, can be used to make you look like a cast member of Planet of the Apes before they stick all that fur and other business all over you. This was a skill we learned from our mother. BEHOLD…

Here is Genevieve, my brother’s fantastic girlfriend:

The deadened eyes really help sell it, don’t you agree?

And not one to ever be outdone here is Louis, demonstrating a variation known as the QuadGrape (that’s top AND bottom lip, for our slower readers):

Holy crap- am I right folks? The collagen in that boy’s face is really something else. (If he keeps QuadGrapin’ the way he is, though, his lips are going to look like deflated balloons by the time he’s 42. Sorry brother, that’s just science.)

And that’s it! You can stop reading now. …

Seriously, people. Nothing to see here.

Okay, FINE, I will show you MY horribly simian, grape-altered face. Here it is.

Are you happy now?

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