Since it makes no sense for me to have a dog in my apartment right now, the next best thing is to grow plants on the porch. (You will notice I skip right over having a cat. That’s a story for another day.)

We are currently growing about 96 pounds of different herbs and vegetables, as well as some wildflowers to attract bees. The wildflowers are from a seed packet that we got as a favor at a wedding. They’ve just started to sprout, which if you’ve ever planted anything from a seed packet that you got at a wedding, is about the most exciting thing that can ever happen:

You may have noticed that little ice plant in there. I didn’t put that there on purpose. It must have been “deposited” by a bird or something.

Here is our parsley, or “garkely” as Louis used to call it.

There is some weird moss crap growing around the base of it. My hope was that the moss would provide the parsley with hallucinogenic properties. It doesn’t. Bummer.

Paul is experimenting with bean farming, which I prefer to call “Bean Husbandry.” You can learn several things from this photo:

1) The beans haven’t begun to sprout yet. (The greenery you see is the beginning of a tomato plant.)

2) We drink nonfat milk

3) We are too cheap to buy a watering can

4) Man, we eat a lot of that lunch meat that comes in those little tupperware containers.

The star of the Porch Garden, though, is a cherry tomato plant that my mom gave us. It’s really starting to take off:

I intend to have my family over for a meal of cherry tomatoes and “garkely” just as soon as it’s harvestin’ time. And then, my dad will have to take pity on us and buy us a second meal so that we don’t all die of starvation.

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