‘Sup?


My name is Liz. I need direction. I overuse commas. My house is a mess, my hair needs a trim, and I have no marketable skills: It's fun here, you'll see!

Got a question, comment, proposal of marriage? Great! Email me at liz@theproductivecough.com

Show Your Love

March 25th, 2015

New Man

Changes, y’all.

You may notice that my little bio there on the upper left no longer says “I wish I had a dog.” That’s because, folks, I now have a dog.

I give you Ira.

It's Ira!

 

Ira, the cricket hunter, the sleeping champion, the scavenger of discarded baked goods.

This little begetter of soft stools has already eaten some size 5 bamboo knitting needles and figured out how to operate the foot pedal on the bathroom trash (spoiler alert, he loves Kleenex). He has also tunneled his way into my heart in a major way. Because, even though he will destroy a squeaky koala just because he doesn’t understand it…

Koala Love 2

…he also does THIS.

It's Ira!

 

Which, if you’ve never had a tiny, warm doggy curl up and go to sleep on you, you are a little bit dead inside, I’m sorry to say. And that is a clinical fact.

Ira has a problem, though. I’m not going to lie. And no, it isn’t his addiction to soiled cotton balls and old Wendy’s wrappers that he picks up in the street (*barf sound*). Ira’s major issue is that he hates gnomes.

I’m not kidding. I really wish I were. And, since Ira is only 9 months old and just can’t have had much experience with gnomes, unpleasant or otherwise, I can only assume that this is a “factory setting.” Watch in shock, as I did, as Ira reacts to the lawn gnome that resides at my parents’.

He is truly a faulty animal. And now I have to live with him.

July 7th, 2013

Yes, You TOO Can Dance!

Hey folks!

Wanna learn how to dance? I mean, really dance? I’m not talking waltzing, or tango, or any of that other nonsense they teach you at the community center. I mean, really get the hell down with your bad self?

Then take a cue from the following music video. Because, guys, the back up dancing in this thing is otherworldly. There isn’t a category for it. It’s sort of hip-hop meets actual hopping meets that drunk guy who grabbed your boobs on the steps of the public library that one time. I mean, this shit is out of control

So please enjoy “?????” by… a dyspeptic man with a respiratory condition, and featuring The Recently Anesthetized Dancers!

 

Video courtesy of My Uncle Clint.

January 30th, 2013

STEAM WARS

Greetings, Each of You!

My Creative Hero and friend, Larry Blamire, has a dream. And that dream is Steam Wars.

LOOK AT THAT! How COOL is that? All of the art is original, done by Larry.

But what’s it all about? From the Steam Wars website:

The powerful Prussian Empire has strengthened its hold on part of Canada and is testing the northern US borders with a series of raids. The United States Steam Force, in its infancy compared to the Prussian war machine, meets the challenge with new and improved lines of ajax class, hercules class and goliath class fighting rigs. At the same time scrambling to find men reckless–make that foolhardy–enough to crew them.

Then rumors start.

That Prussia has acquired a new technology. That they’re developing something bigger and better, that even the finest USSF rigs cannot defend against.

And warfare would never be the same…

Below is the brief, animated promotional trailer for Steam Wars, created by Larry and editor Bill Russell. Please pass this along, as maximum exposure will help give the project legs. Big, coal-powered legs.

February 11th, 2012

Things About You – Louis & Genevieve

Check out the latest video by my brother and his girlfriend, Louis & Genevieve! It’s called Things About You and it makes you want to dance.

COMMENCE DANCIN’—>

 

BLAM! Good right? Now, go purchase this on iTunes.

September 22nd, 2011

Pearly Shells

 

You’re welcome.
(Courtesy of my cousin, Emily.)

August 1st, 2011

PetBoy Wiggler

I just came across one of my old favorite’s on YouTube. It’s a video featuring a puppet which my Uncle Clint crafted lovingly. I think you’ll enjoy it. The description reads: “The world’s most brilliantly crafted and skillfully manipulated single-stringed marrionette puppet (Pet Boy Wiggler) performs with the enthusiasm and vigor of a living, breathing little man.”

 

October 7th, 2010

Louis & Genevieve: The Album!

Today’s post will accomplish two things: First, I will try and get you to purchase Louis and Genevieve’s new album. Second, I will post video of my little brother that is labeled as a reason to buy his album but is really just a way for me to show you all HOW FRICKING CUTE HE WAS before he got all tall and masculine and could speak English properly. Let’s get started, shall we?

Guys, let me just say that my brother wasn’t always a musical genius. Case in point:

But as he’s grown older, he’s really become one:

You’ve already bought and enjoyed his first album. Now, he and Genevieve Artadi have released a self-produced album, which you can buy and enjoy here. The songs, all originals, are a healthy mix of funky, beautiful, wild, and delicate. As always, Louis and Genevieve have given us lyrics that, along with complexity, pack a healthy dose of humor.

Which Louis wasn’t very good at when he was a kid, either. Check out his rendition of “Orange You Glad I Didn’t Say Banana.”

April 28th, 2010

Hey! Wanna See Me “Act?”

Here is what happens when a guy I met on Twitter asks me, and a couple of other Twitter folk, to do a webcam-only version of a scene from The Breakfast Club. Christian Blair asked me to play the part of Claire in the comfort of my living room while he, Ted Travelstead, and Ting Wong, played the other three parts. None of us has ever met in person– it was all done online, then (very well) edited by Christian. Truly inspired. Please watch and love this. DISCLAIMER: I am not, nor have I ever claimed to be, an actress. Also, for some reason, I chose to wear a hat.

Bravo, Clubmates!

April 27th, 2010

Justin Beiber’s Baby: An Interpretation

Hey guys! Louis and Genevieve are at it again. This time, it’s a fantastically creative cover of Justin Bieber’s “Baby.” I particularly like the headgear they’ve selected. Enjoy, everyone!

(It does not feature Ludacris, but it does feature editing by me.)

April 1st, 2010

Date-A-Human.com Launches!

Paul, Matt, and Willy, the Funbox guys, have written a new webseries for Babelgum.com entitled Date A Human.com. It takes place in the future, when human males are only interested in repopulating their species. Our heroine doesn’t want to be pregnant, and so she signs up for a dating website where alien males search for eligible human females.

Trust me. Hilarity ensues.

Click HERE to watch the first three episodes!