Recently, my friend Feldman (that’s him above) visited Chicago. He sent me a photo album of all the pictures he took, but has yet to tell me anything about the trip. So I took it upon myself to piece together what happened on his vacation based only on the photos I have.

The trip over was a difficult one, and Feldman and his crew hit rough seas while sailing from California to Chicago:

When Feldman and his crew (above) arrived their first stop, naturally, was a bar.

Feldman’s crew soon deserted him, and he was on his own, stumbling around the streets of Chicago. While in his drunkeness, he was visited by the spirit of President Obama.

“Feldmaaaaaan,” said the spirit, “You’re in Chicagooooo. Have some pizzaaaaaaa…” And with that, he vanished.

After waking up in front of this building…… Feldman got a pizza.

And then some other food.

All of this put young Feldman in a food-induced stupor, causing him to hallucinate Aslan, The Great Lion:

Aslan told him to go to his hotel room- there would be a surprise for him there. Sure enough, when Feldman entered his room, a man appeared as if by magic…

…and offered Feldman this half-eaten hot dog.

Which Feldman gladly accepted.

THE END

Bookmark this!